The power to circumcise yourself

the power to pee standing up when your a woman

The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

The power to make your penis able to go through any nown material in the universe even a dwarf star. However it is 1000x more sensitive to pain than normal. And once you start you can't stop until it's trough.

The power to barely touch anything in space and time, but only with the pointer finger on your not dominant hand.

the power that makes your ass turn into a shit machine gun, but you can only use it if its directed at your mouth.

Being able to talk to fish, By turning into aquaman

The power to automaticaly eat yourself when you get hungry

The ability to control when a certain crow caws, but only of it was born in Bejing,China and raised in Ansterdam.

The power to control Rollie pollies

the ability to know if a video game sucks just by looking at the name

The power to instantly waste all your money on cheap mango chutney at will.

The power to sexually attract whales

The power to fly.......but only in your underwear.

The ability to change clothes instantly every 67 years

The power to speak any language, provided that no one around you can understand it.

The ability to read any language and understand it perfectly but only in pitch black darkness.

The power of getting aroused when someone rubs your kneecaps.

The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

The power to think of pointess facts at any given moment

The power to lift liquids, as long as they're in some sort of solid container.

The power to run slightly faster than Usain bolt

The power to see into the present

The power to turn into Patrick Star permenently and be dumb as him.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!