The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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The ability to sit on air, provided you are in space.

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the power to turn O2 into CO2

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Turn gold into lead.

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The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

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the power to see through my eye lids

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The power to time-travel to the moment you die.

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the ability to fly to Pluto holding ur breath

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the ability to throw a midget further than any mortal man

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the ability to own a computer without a power cord

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The power to turn invisible but only when playing a trombone

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The power to change delicious chocolate fudge into mud of the exact colour and texture.

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The power to automatically register soda caps online, but only if it's Diet.

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The power to fly into the sun.

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The power to be immune to every third bullet.

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the power to be a shitstick on a stick with a shitstick on a shit with a shitstick

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Having Wolverine’s ability to healing from any damage, but still healing at a normal human rate of recovery.

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To be able to make a pencil dull... Get it it point less!!!!!

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The power of heat vision* *Only for cooking.

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The power to always choose the broken condoms without knowing

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The power to eat anything in a minute.

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The power to believe people will vote for you`re comment, which starts WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY in the back.

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The power to give yourself a BJ.

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the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!