The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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The power to move infinitely fast up spiral staircases, but the inability to go down them.

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the power to suddenly have suicidal thoughts

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The power to meme 20% harder

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The power to troll the Internet.

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The power to speak in morse code

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The power to read minds, but only your own.

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The power to become paralyzed whenever you're aroused.

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The power to make any woman have earth shattering totally consuming climaxes at will, but only if she's having sex with another man

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the power to die....

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The ability to become a paraplegic at will.

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The power to control your own mind.

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The power to instantly pee when you see a person.

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The ability to get a headache when you do or say something stupid.

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The ability to move your own internal organs, causing extruciating pain

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The power to inhale beverages through your genitals.

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ability to fly in a plane

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the power of piss mountain dew and shit cheeseburgers

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The power to come second in any race

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The power to be a mistborn but only if you're on Scadrial.

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The power to increase the rate of plant and fungal matter growth by 15% by staring intently at it.

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power to make you the last man on earth, but all the ladies are lesbian

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the power to say i can bend you

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The power to travel forward in time at the speed of normal time.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!