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Pointless Super Powers
Republican Equals
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The power to communicate with earthworms.
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+4
The power to create cavities in your teeth.
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-38
The power to fly at the speed of sound, but only at ground level with your eyes closed.
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-60
The power to fall from any height and stop in midair right before you hit the ground, then continue falling with 100x the velocity from before you stopped.
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-62
The power to make any girl attracted to you. Unless the girl is anywhere above a 7 on the hot scale
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-72
The power to add a minus to your bank account balance.
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-72
the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection
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-84
the ability to turn a banana into an apple at will, but only for a few seconds.
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-110
The ability to create ducks at will. - Amador Diaz
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+151
the ability to not get pregnant when you get raped
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+63
The power to sleep through a dream.
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+61
The power to get 100% on every test but get caught for cheating.
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+51
The power to turn gold into stones.
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+49
The power to cure cancer pantients of minor rashes.
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+19
The power to have explosive diarrhea involuntarily but only on dinners with your date and his/her parents.
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-1
The power to control all bleach within one-hundred feet.
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-43
The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...
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-53
The ability yo smell your own breath, but only when you have a stuffy nose.
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-77
ability to say a new letter anywone can say that
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-97
The power to develop a cancerous tumor anywhere in your body at any time you want.
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-103
The ability to explode upon contact with glass.
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+56
you can talk to dust but they dont respond in a language you can understand
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+40
The power to communicate with nearby aliens
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-6
The power to walk through a unlocked door.
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-6
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!