The ability to read anything, and never understand it.

the power to wake up each mourning with a fast food joint mascot next to you saying "You were great last night"

The power to go back in time but only in the year 17.

the power to be imune to fire but only when is -40ºC

The power to change the channel with your mind, but only to the Weather Network.

the power to poo every time someone asks you out

The power to dissasemble yourself, but not re-assemble yourself.

the power to fall asleep in your bed and wake up in a trash compacter

the ability to fly 6 inches off the groung

The ability to make someone slightly attracted to a faucet.

The ability to hand in assignments 1 day late

The useless pewer to increase your useless power at will! Moral: THE POWER TO SPAWN IN THE CENTER OF THE SUN AFTER DEATH INCREASE!

the power to read the thoughts of inanimate objects.

The ability to never pick up on sarcasm.

The power to have extremely good eye site, but only when your eyes are closed!

Th pwr t frgt vwls.

the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

The ability to get a headache when you do or say something stupid.

The power to move infinitely fast up spiral staircases, but the inability to go down them.

the power to fly twice every 22 years for 6 seconds in you room with the door closed

the power of piss mountain dew and shit cheeseburgers

The power to raise one eyebrow and make one person looking at you raise their eyebrow, then one person looking at them raise their eyebrow, and so on.

The power to read the minds of the mentally disabled.

The power to make rain stop, only on sunny days.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!