The power to ma-FUCK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY!!!!!

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The power to issue commands to domesticated house cats. Not the power to make them obey your commands, just the power to issue the commands.

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The power to turn freshwater into saltwater

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The power to peel stickers

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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The power to turn a rock into a slightly bigger rock

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The ability to smooth a criminal

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The power to make any can of soda react as though it has been dropped down a flight of stairs when you open it.

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The Power of shitting by your mouth

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the power to burp a fart

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The power to cure cancer, in people already dead.

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The power to grab a cats face

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The ability to dissolve your own organs. They don't grow back, either.

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The power to have your brain shut down when you take any type of drug

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The Power to Make yourself 5 different levels of scared...

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The ability to do arithmetic one year after 1st grade.

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The power to control Rollie pollies

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The ability to run at the speed of light, but being born without limbs.

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The power to enlarge your penis, along with severe cardiovascular disease.

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The power to turn cake into poop.

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The power to teleport your self 5 feet ahead of you every 3 seconds

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The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

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The power to sit anywhere

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the ability to slap someone with your foot

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!