The power to make pointless super powers

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The power to be able to get bobble heads that instantly disappear after 0000000000000000.1 seconds

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The ability to perform crippling blowjobs on your enemies, but as soon as you finish you are teleported (in the same position) randomly to a crowded part of Russia.

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the power to masturbate just one time a day

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The power to be quite good at checkers.

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The power to automatically register soda caps online, but only if it's Diet.

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The power to turn into a slightly uncomfortable pair of pants.

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The power to flush the toilet in the opposite direction.

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The power to change the channel with your mind, but only to the Weather Network.

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the power to poo every time someone asks you out

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the power to give extreme diarrhea to only your grandmother and your house pet

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the ability to fly 6 inches off the groung

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The power to peak braille

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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The power to make doughnuts rapidly advance in age

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The power to see through objects, thus not seeing anything.

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the power to fall asleep in your bed and wake up in a trash compacter

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the power to fly twice every 22 years for 6 seconds in you room with the door closed

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the power to bleed to death from a paper cut.

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You cant move but you can transform in to a sloth.

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Th pwr t frgt vwls.

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The power to jump super high, without landing ok.

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the power to speak in sign language.

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The power to sing like Rebecca Black.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!