The power to automatically blink rapidly at the rate of 1,588 times per second everytime you open your mouth.

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the power to know when a politician is lying

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The power to even

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The power to digest corn.

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the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

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The ability to get free housing for at least 25 years after running over your neighbor.

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The power to open doors the opposite way they were made to open.

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The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

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The power to stare at deckchairs without blinking

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the power to enter a coma.

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The ability to see the future through the eyes of people you don't know in places you can never go while you are doing life threatening work.

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The ability to shoot a banana from your eyebrow every time you are riding on a unicycle.

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The power to know when to hold them, but not know when to fold them.

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the power to time travel to the present

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The power to beat up anyone but only if u sneeze first

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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The power to be gay on command.

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The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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The ability to give yourself a stroke just using your mind.

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The power to explode when someone looks at you and regenerate in 10 minute after exploding but you can only regenerate from exploding.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to lick your own elbow

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The ability to eat whole chickens at will, but only when yr not hungry.

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The power to never come into existence

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!