The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

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The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to be an idiot.

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To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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The ability to go to hell.

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The power to live in lava, but only when your cold

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The power to turn a light on with your mind, but only if the light is already on

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The power to know when to hold them, but not know when to fold them.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The power to turn into an exploding pink chair.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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the power to fail at everything you do

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The power to touch your toes

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the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

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The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

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The power to turn any object into food

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The power to be gay on command.

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The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

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the power to burp every time you drink 1 litre of soda/fizzy

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The ability to understand everything about a language after 100 years of intense studying when you could be doing something more interesting.

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The power to start typing a sentance and then start writing another way to save on your car insurance is to take the The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start to write a book about a magic trick that reveals cards

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The power to create mysterious stains on your clothes.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!