The power to be constantly reminded of the game

I have the power to force farts out of my ass.

The ability to have telekinesis on February the 30th

The power to stare at deckchairs without blinking

The power to be an idiot.

The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

The power to see through things like locked cabinets, wrapped birthday presents etc. But only if you know whats inside.

the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

The power to be missed when present.

The power to know when to hold them, but not know when to fold them.

The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

The power to crap without pissing.

power to drop the soap in the jail shower room

The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

The power to keep up with the kardashians

The power to make Thursday come before Friday and after Wednesday.

the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

The power to control the weather, but only in space

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!