The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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The power to summon a spray of bullets going everywhere in the room, and bullet-vulnerability.

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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The power to be invincible......... only when you are not in danger or harm.

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The power to breathe slightly faster

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The power to turn everything you touch into cheese

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The power to shit on the ceiling

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The power to get an A+ on every test- but you need to study for 5 hours or so ahead of time

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

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The ability to poop glue.

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The power to have no superpower

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the power to be physically attracted to the same sex

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the ability to make a really long post ajsfffffhkshgdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddfgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggjssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssa

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

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The power to uncontrollably say "thats what she said" whenever it is possible, even if its really shitty

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The power to smell water.

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the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

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The ability to break every bone in your body every second, then have super speed. You wouldn't be able to run.

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Super empathy! The power to feel the suffering of every living being...

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The power to predict the present

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The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!