The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

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The power to start typing a sentance and then start writing another way to save on your car insurance is to take the The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start to write a book about a magic trick that reveals cards

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the ability to get the chills when someone close to you has an erection.

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The power to change your urine to any color

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An extra set of eyes...in your scrotum

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The power to only be obesely fat.

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the power to refreeze frozen ice

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The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

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the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

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The power to instantaneously fall asleep but only when tomorrow is a day off.

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the power to melt your bones

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the power to teleport but then immediatly cr@p your pants

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the power to die on the spot

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The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

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the power to breathe in space but have to be were there is gravity

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The power to change your hair's color to white when you're old.

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to not blink for 5 seconds

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The power to make someone hate crayons by poking your left eyebrow while looking at them.

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the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

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The power to convert Oxygen into chemical energy and waste gases.

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The power to serve the Lord Dog.

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The power to revive people with terminal disease, and still they have it.

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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The ability of holding your breath for the rest of your life.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!