Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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The power to stand in line at the DMV with a smile on your face.

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The ability to be a 100% accurate shooter in basketball, however u get blocked every time you shoot

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The power to pee while standing up

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The power to be Obama when he's not president anymore

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The power to be a snail

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The power to be well feed for a day, after you eat. Dinner

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The power to type random pointless powers on a website for pointless powers.

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The power to be in any position, and still be comfortable.

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The power to die,but only if your alive!

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The power to even

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The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

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The power to think oppositely

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The power to breathe slightly faster

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The power to become sick only to spread it to your enemy but you can't stop being sick until you have treatment.

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The ability to sense every time your mom and dad are doing it even when you don't want to.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The power to extend your pinky toe

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yo mama

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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The ability to have have any powers with over 1500 likes in this website for 20 seconds at a time

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the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

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The power to make instruments taste mayonnaise.

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The power of telling the name of ANY song/music ever made by just listening the first three seconds of it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!