The power to permanently shorten your own penis

the power to poop every 5 minutes

The power to... We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

The ability to make cringe worthy YouTube videos

The power to get an A+ on every test- but you need to study for 5 hours or so ahead of time

The power to find anything on google. EXCEPT PORN.

The power to control weather on Mars

open up pickles glass

The power to walk upside down but only when you're in Australia.

the power to turn into a piece of paper

the power to have super strength but only wile you are sleeping,

The power to never be cold, but only when it is above 80 degrees.

The power to teleport yourself into space without a spacesuit on

the ability to make your eyes pop out.

The power to no sweat in the cold.

The power to be out of the kitchen... and a woman

The power to part clouds when there are no clouds.

The power to make everything worse

The power to think of your death and then you die.

teleport to the place where you stand

The power to create a slight aroma of cucumbers

the power to have 20/20 vision only when wearing aviators

The power to ignore useful information

the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!