The power to be french.

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The power to let someone control your dick

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The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

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The power to produce a hand vacuum from your belly button that only sucks up lint for your belly button

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The power to find anything on google. EXCEPT PORN.

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The power to shrink your hand only when its inside a pringles container.

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The power to run Crysis.

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the power to hovertate

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The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

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The epic power of laser pointer vision.

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The power to stare at deckchairs without blinking

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The power to read your own mind

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The power to make Q-Tips rain from the sky every month

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The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

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yo mama

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

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The power to summon a spray of bullets going everywhere in the room, and bullet-vulnerability.

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The power to fly but only in your room

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The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

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The power to bleed anally at will

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The power to telepathically fold paper.

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The ability to smell colors

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The ability to type with your penis on your smart phone during a video chat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!