The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

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The power to single handily tear one sheet of toilet paper from the roll

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the power to solve any problem and answer any question or equation, you just have to read all books known to mankind.

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you can shoot cars but the always hit you

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making a sentence of pointless superpowers on pointlesssuperpower.com.

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The power to give yourself a migraine at will.

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the power to burp every time you drink 1 litre of soda/fizzy

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power to make only right turns. take THAT nascar!

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The power to start typing a sentance and then start writing another way to save on your car insurance is to take the The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start to write a book about a magic trick that reveals cards

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The power to uncontrollably say "thats what she said" whenever it is possible, even if its really shitty

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The power to finish anyone's sentience.

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The power of slowing down your reflexes respond whenever you want.

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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the power to shoot what your looking at but only when your looking at watermelons

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the power to see everyone as a tree

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The power to make Justin Bieber be dead but only when you are listening to someone good at singing

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The power to listen to Meghan Straight talk

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The power to give people std's during intercourse

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Nobody in the world has super-powers.

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the power to get F's on assignments without trying

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power to permanently shrink one eye.

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The ability to dehydrate yourself at will.

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The power to vote for the Presidential candidate of your choice, only to be overruled by the Florida Supreme Court.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!