The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

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The power to defeat any ant you may encounter.

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The power to play Call of Duty for free, if you've already bought the game not for free.

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the power to fax people with your mind

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The power to teleport homeless people to the sun

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the ability to see as well as stevie wonder

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the ability to take an apple core out of the bin at will

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the ability to do see through any girl's clothes but you must be singing a Demi Lovato song at 76.786 Decibels EXACTLY!

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The power to create shit

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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The power to always know the exact time.

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The power to be able to make something usable but have it disappear when you try to use it.

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The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

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The ability to change the color of your socks while wearing shoes

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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The power to lick your balls.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to turn into the Hulk, but only when you are asleep.

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the power to teleport but it takes longer than it would to walk to your destination.

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The Power to Power

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The power to become retarded but your so stupid you forget how to turn it off

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The power to do anything else but worship me. Moral: I DEMAND SATISFACTION! I mean I dont need it, I just want you to do something useful with your life for once... That practically makes me into a saint... Aww.... Steve Jobs No More... LOOOOOOOLLLIPOP!

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The power to die

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The ability to grow breasts once a year.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!