The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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The power to date women if they say 'Yes' when you ask if they want to date.

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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The ability when standing still you hover 1milimeter

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the power to die 10 minutes after reading this comment

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The power to speak a language only you can undeerstand

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The power to grow more genitals.

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The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

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the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

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The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

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the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

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The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

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The power to turn into a lamp once.

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The power to have any girl as your girl friend but they turn ugly

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The power to hold your pee for 5 minutes longer than normal.

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The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

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The power to time travel 60 seconds a minute

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The power to die from darting too hard

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The power to jump 1 inch higher.

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The power to instantaneously fall asleep but only when tomorrow is a day off.

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Liam Brudenell

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The power to never be old but died at young age

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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The power to turn into a tree.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!