The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The ability when standing still you hover 1milimeter

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the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

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The power to hear in the dark.

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the power to change people socks on command

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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The power to fly, but only fly north

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The power to go back in time, but only as Anne Frank during the Holocaust.

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The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

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The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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The power to shape-shift only into a human

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The power to revive people, however it only works on people who commit genocide.

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the power to get F's on assignments without trying

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The ability to swim in water.

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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Be dumb and gay like austin Calhoun

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The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

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The power to make pencils dull.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!