Eclairvoiance: The ability to forsee when you will eat your next cream-filled, chocolate coated pastry...

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The ability to die instantly

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The power to be immune to everything,except things that can kill you.

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The power to see through windows

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The power to turn into a slightly smaller, weaker version of yourself.

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The power to fall down stairs sooner than you should have.

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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The power to have gravity.

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The power to be french.

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The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

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The power to divide by zero

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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The power to be first on any form of media (youtube powers).

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The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

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The power to become black!

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The power to shrink boobs

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The power to run Crysis.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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the power to turn into celebs that evryonr loves to write about only infront of 1 million people

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The power to turn toast back into bread

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The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

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The power to smell feces from a mile away.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

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The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!