The power to turn into a magikarp

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The ability when standing still you hover 1milimeter

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The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The power to hear in the dark.

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the power to change people socks on command

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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The power to fly, but only fly north

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

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The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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The power to revive people, however it only works on people who commit genocide.

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the power to melt your bones

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The power to shape-shift only into a human

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The power to die from darting too hard

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!