the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

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The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

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the power to animate condiments

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The power to read this.

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The power to quit smoking 5 times in a week.

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the power to stare at pit bulls in the eyes and imitate them

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The power to turn Dollars into Pennies

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the power to turn retarted

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The power to autocorrect your mom.

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The ability to control Do-Do Birds

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The ability to be heard in space

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The superpower to die in a 1 second.

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The power to tap dance awesomely, but only when wearing bunny slippers.

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The power of fart only in front of cheerleaders

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The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

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The power to kill anyone just by threatening them with slavery and death and leaving foot and fingerprints all around their place. Moral: THREATEN MY PEOPLE WITH SLAVERY AND DEATH! THIS IS SPARTA!

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The Power to make PotNoodle...

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

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The power to lose your voice when you yell a lot.

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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The power to take my legs off the floor while in a sitting position.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!