- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to die instantly from not reading books, meaning if you don't read books you'll die.

The power to generate electricity, unfortunately, you're not resistant to it.

The power to elect George W Bush.

The ability to straighten pictures on a wall with your mind.

The power to make any woman fall in love with you, only when your wife is beside you.

The power to jump high into the sky, only to drop down later...

The power to make any liquid luke warm (it works both ways)

The power become a kite but not when it's windy

The power to float in water, and then sink sometimes.

The power to run at 0.5mph

The power to collect a interesting variety of ceramic animals.

Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

The power to see through glass walls.

The power to disintegrate yourself

The power to like any show

The power to sharpen a pen

The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

The ability to not slip on banana peels

Pointless Super Powers