The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

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The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

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the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

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The power to release the bogus

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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The power to have hindsight.

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

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The power to die whenever you feel the slightest bit joyful, happy excited, etc.

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The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

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The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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The power to fly 3 inches.

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The power to make every single person in the world hate you and want you dead.

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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The power to walk on water, but only if its temperature is below 0° C

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

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Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

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The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

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The power throw up hockey pucks every few minutes.

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!