The power to be dead

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The uncontrollable ability to turn oncomming vehicles headlights on. But only at night, when you are passing them.

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The power to use the internet whenever you want, but only on dialup

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the power to read and agree with the terms of service

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the power to type without looking at the keyboard

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The power to summon earthworms

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The power to make all girls look pretty but only in your head and only if you drunk enough.

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The power to fly, but only when you're on a plane

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The ability to bleed for 3-5 days once a month

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The power to only drink when your parents are watching.

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The power to make coma patients bark.

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the power to in power your self

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The superpower of surviving a gunshot, if properly attended in a hospital afterwards.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The ability to walk on your hands, but only when they are attached to your legs.

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Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

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The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

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the power to be an incest pedo called jack sanders.

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The power to turn into birdseed

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Pointless Superpowers? Eh, I got nothing.

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The power to look extremely bored and emotionless when typing "lol" or "xD"

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The super power to power any electronics at will. But you need 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 Apms in your body to power a phone for 0,0000000001 seconds.

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The power to freeze ice

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The ablity to slap a policeman and get away with it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!