The power to become white by going into midtown harlem at night and shouting: I HATE NEGROES!!! At the top of your lungs.

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The power to have a shield stretch across your vagina, but is only activated when you see a very attractive man.

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The abilty to go through water.

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The power to travel in time for 2 seconds

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The power to be MAGNETO! And have the power to WELCOME TO DIE! You dare not WELCOME TO DIE? AHAHAH! X-CHICKEN!

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the power to have the remote come to you.

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The power to know the name of every show while the title card is in front of you but only if you are holding cheap mango chutney

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The power to telepathically fold paper.

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The power to fart in technicolor.

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The power of flight but only during thunderstorms

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Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

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The power to resurrect as a corpse when you die.

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Having the power to see in the dark if you are blind

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The power to wake up every morning and have to pee

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The power to find the droid you're looking for.

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The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

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The ability to make slightly off colored flags of any country that can not be used in combat.

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The power to find gold in your nose but only when you pick it in front of others

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The ability to swim in water.

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The power to temporarily give yourself a random STD.

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The power to transform any cutlery into a plastic spork, but only when you're in life threatening situations.

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The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

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The power to turn jelly into peanut butter, but only in quantities of 17 gallons.

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The power to die at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!