The power to skip the Kripp.

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The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

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The power to not get crushed, only if you're in contact with something.

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Normal handsome man by day. Moral: Man by night.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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The power to make food slightly smaller.

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The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

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The power to stop bleeding 3-5 days a month.

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the power to keep your fingertips wet at all times, so you can flip pages.

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The power to see when people fart.

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The power to grow one wing

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The ability to dodge bullets, but only after you've been hit by the first bullet.

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The power to fly, but only when you're on a plane

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the ability to make your penis more sophistcated than yourself

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The power to kill anything you touch, but only when touching adorable puppies.

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you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

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The power to make birds levitate as you walk by them.

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the power to do blink every 20 years

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The power to cry if you hear or see the word cry

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The power to create powers

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the power to inhale and exhale air

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The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!