The power to always know the exact time.

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The power to live.

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The power of telepathy but only when you alone

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The power to turn all people into giant robots which you don't control

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The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

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The ability to turn into any inanimate object, but you can't turn back.

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The power to be an exceedingly homosexual man and be constantly surrounded by sexy women.

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The power to eat nails and crap broken glass.

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ??!l!q? ???

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The power to repeat any superpower listed and getting several points until someone discovers its just a copy.

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The power to make yourself not have a super power

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The power to strangle yourself to death

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The power to magically create a shampoo bottle in your hands but only when you're on the toilet

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The power of women's rights.

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To be able to summon old people

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The power to pick something up and stay the same but smell bad.

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The power to be extremely well-endowed while having sex, but only when masturbating

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The power to procrastinate so much, you don't even eat, and eventually die.

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The power drown in water

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the power to relive the least important moments in history

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the ability to say either "beans are magical!" or "beans are fruit!" in an angry tone, and have people believe you

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Being able to not go to the bathroom...when you have to!

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Breath powers so strong your normal breath alone can break down walls whenever you get a cold.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!