The power to grow your own armpit hair at a rate of 1 ft/day, and change its color at will.

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Be able to create fire with your hands but you are not invisible to it

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The power to resist Buzz Lightyear´s lazer beam, but only in real life

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Being able to wiggle your left pinky & right ring-finger exceptionally fast.

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The power to eat broken glass and shit windows.

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The ability to fart like a zombie.

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To grow your fingernails out and in very quickly.

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The ability to speak Latin but only when no one can hear you

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The power of turning poo into Adam Sandler movies

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The power to only drink when your parents are watching.

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The power to throw fire out of your hands but at the same time burn your hands.

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The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

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the power to tolerate all the crap superpowers

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the power to ejaculate when a hot girl walks by

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The power to let someone control your dick

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The power to have withdrawal symptoms.

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The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

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The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

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The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!

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You dont HAVE to give my former comment a thumbs ups, I mean why should I care about your opinion and needs etc? Moral: But admit to yourself that it was awesome, or else you are just lying to yourself, doing ya a favor kiddo.

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The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

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the power to piss at will but only when your bladder is full

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the power to fart the alphebet

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The power to accelerate your own aging when you're happy. Unfortunately it's irreversible.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!