The ability to turn cement into pudding

the ability to make your penis more sophistcated than yourself

The power to transport yourself back in time to when the universe began!

The power to call any phone number in the world, but only when using a phone owned by someone you don't know.

The power to type so damn many superpowers that your head is spinning, and wanting to keep doing it because you really like this thing, its so... fulfilling... Moral: What can I say, people fight so much over who is right, and go to war just to prove their points... I LOVE POINTLESSITTY! (Pointlessitty, is not a typo, its a shakespearean slip you ignoramoron) Fun fact: A shakesperean is by itself a grammatically incorrect word, but not a typo simply because I used it on purpose... wow thats crazy... agree? Then thumb me DOWN NOW!

The power to immediately become comatose every time you blink.

The power to control dodos

The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

The power to stand still for five hours

The ability to levetate three-four inches only when you are alone in an elevator.

the power to get a 100" erection but only over your dead greatgrandma

the power to make ur fingernails fall and the go into a coma when someone says hello.

The power to see into the future and past but not remember any of it.

The ability to turn into an embryo

The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

The power to know all the answers to life after you are fatally wounded.

The power to turn into shit, but not be able to change back.

The power to be able to run at the speed of light only when you have no energy to stand up

The power to get a boner when you're horny.

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

Meatvision.

The power to be able to fall asleep instantly

The power to touch the ground using only your feet

The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!