- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to immediately become comatose every time you blink.

The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

The power to run at 0.5mph

The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

The power to become allmighty and imortal, all you need to do is to touch either Kryptonite, or adamantium.

The power that will grant you no power.

The power to communicate with applesauce.

The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

The power to fly but only when your feet are on the ground

The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

the power to spit long distances at inconvenient times

The power to make clean socks dirty.

The power to make your boss s**t his pants during staff meetings

the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

The power to breathe oxygen.

The power to see through things but you can't turn it off once turned on.

the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

Pointless Super Powers