The ability to breath in a complete vacuum but nowhere else

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Third armpit.

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The power to masturbate only when someone is watching.

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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to make asians smart

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The power to overcome any addiction by constantly doing whatever you are addicted to.

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the power to win any shit eating contest.

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the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

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the ability to post here

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The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

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The power to make bananas appear, at the sight of a cobweb..

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The power to levitate birds with your mind.

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the power to only get an erection when a family member is looking

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The power to make things disappear when I shut my eyes, then bring them back when I open them.

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Apathy for the world. (Don't stop believing.)

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The ability to speak Latin but only when no one can hear you

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The power to turn into birdseed

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the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

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The power to encounter an internal server error

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the power to tolerate all the crap superpowers

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the power to walk up the stairs without losing your breath...

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The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

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The power to waste time talking about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive

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The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!