The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

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The ability to breath in a complete vacuum but nowhere else

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You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

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Meatvision.

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The power to finish work instantly but only after the deadline

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the power to take a poo everywhere but on the toilet

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The power to transform your foreskin to rusty iron.

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The power to slap your buttcheeks together, then transform into a head of cabbage.

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THE POWER TO MAKE SHIT

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the power to distinguish gays from not gays..

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The ability to eat whole chickens at will, but only when yr not hungry.

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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The power to see John Cena, but only when he taps out/gives up.

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the power to see into the present.

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Eat pizza but you have to be eating pizza

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The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

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The power to get your comment 1st

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the power to see through glass

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The power to turn int water when your in water.

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The power to see forever

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the power to speak bulagrian for 28 sec every 37 day

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Hearing so good a raindrop will deafen you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!