A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to have an ejaculate in your pants by looking a girl in the eyes.

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You can fly, but only while on a plane that's in the air.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to see very far with the eyes closed.

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The power to make every single person in the world hate you and want you dead.

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You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

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The ability to fly, but only when you wear absolutely nothing.

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the power to read whenever somebody is about to make a pun but only if youve already heard that pun

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The power to slap your buttcheeks together, then transform into a head of cabbage.

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The ability to hear fish.

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the power to solve any problem and answer any question or equation, you just have to read all books known to mankind.

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The power to hear a dog whistle

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The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

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u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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to travel in time....2 minutes in the past exactly after..masturbation.... masturbation-time-loop...........

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The power to be 1% bullet proof.

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The power to incriminate yourself in a crime you didnt commit

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The power to turn into a toothpick. Once. And you can't go back.

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The superpower to speak from to anybody's asshole.

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The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

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A parapalegic with super strength! Oh and with lockjaw, and addicted to Botox.

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the power to feel the emotions of other people, that are severely depressed.

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The power to explode on demand.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!