The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

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the ability to manually control your breathing

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The power to achieve 98% opacity

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The power to comment on Facebook with a pencil.

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The power to start time.

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the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

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The power to text while driving and dies of cancer.

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the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

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power to poop out 5x5 ice cube

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The power to see what a person is wearing.

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the power to be able to get pointless superpowers

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The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

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The Ability to shit studs once a week

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The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

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the power to kill plants in a desert.

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The power to go in jail every time you are alone.

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The ability to create bruises on your body but not know where they came from, and then poke them.-.Jack

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The power to walk on frozen water.

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The power to die when you get scared.

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The power to see in black and white.

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The power to produce fingernails at will that people can eat.

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The power to increase the amount of earwax by 300 percent at will.

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The power to turn anything you touch into old.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!