the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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To get to know everything Jack Nicholson has said yet you blurb out his comments and random and by the time you face this YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: You think this entry was boring? It is great actually, what? You say it sucks? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

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The ability to kick in a three point shot but only during a game.

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the ability to lick your own anus

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The power to not have powers that arent pointless but then you realize your a normal human bein then you just think hey mabey I can be like Batman but then also you were like hey why am I not a multi-billionaire . After this all you find out you have the power to wake up at 12 pm only while using a alarm clock set for 7 am

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the ability to write using your 'inside' voice but only once your vocal cords are compromised

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The power to travel in time but only to the moment of your death.

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The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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The power to find the last piece of a jigsaw puzzle

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The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

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the power to not have a power

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The power to just eat one lays potato chip

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The power to stop writing stupid shit on the internet.

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The power to paint with all the colors of the wind!

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The power to touch MC Hammer.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

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The power to have a poo at your girlfriend's house and be only 22.2% sure that it will flush

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The power to look at yourself in third person

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The power to teleport 10 years into the past just by sneezing. You also become hyper allergic to everything. And of course, you have no way to travel forward...

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The power to enter into a Coalition with the Conservative Party

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The power to repel women.

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The power to uncontrollably make your clothes dissapear and only in church.

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the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!