The power to stop time, but only when you are waiting for something.

The power to stop time but if you do so you will also stop.

The power to remember everything then forgetting it 10 seconds later.

the power to shit liquidly

The power to attract bullets.

The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

A healing punch

The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

The power to know the ending of every movie after you watch the first 10 minutes and compulsively shouting it out as loud as you can.

power to eat through your but

The power to ma-FUK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSY

The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

The ppwer to say SHAZAM, Then someone says wat?

The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

The power to have every single power you can imagine but not able to use any of them

The power to be yourself.

The power to be more human than most people.

the power to vote

The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

The power to touch the ground using only your feet

The amazing ability to shart at your own will.

The power to travel through time to get through school but then fail at life.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!