The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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The ability to know when men have erections

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[insert pointless super powers here]

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the power to be in AA.

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The power to only drink liquids

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The power to laugh while laughing.

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The power to turn into a parking lot.

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The power to only be able to mind control goldfish one at a time

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the power to fly but your an Altophobic

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The power to make yourself numb and fall to the ground

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The power to like this comment while you can't like any other ones.

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The power to sweat acid.

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The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

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The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

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The power to recite 1,000 digits of pie, but only when you need to say the Fibonacci sequence

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the power to fart mace

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The power to control time, space and rule the universe... But only when you are dreaming.

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The power to make dad jokes.

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The ability to become the most influential person within the borders of Idaho

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The power to write any thing on your chest with clear paint

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the power to pee and sneeze at the same time.

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the power to make your best friend's crush fall in love with you, but not your own crush.

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the power to do blink every 20 years

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!