The power to levitate mustard.

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The ability to catch any ilness you want.

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The ability to tell when someone last used the bathroom by licking their thumb.

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The power to have logs come out a tiny hole in your body. Oh wait... - SMC Digital

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The power to have any super power you need, unless you need to use that super power

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being able to blow up and die

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The power to bring Magic: the Gathering cards to life, but only the land cards.

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The power to see through walls, but only when you're in a glass room.

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the power to turn a leaf into a different type of leaf

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The power to at anytime cover yourself in flames and fly very fast by yelling FLAME ON! only to die a horrible death as you are not immune to your flames...

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The power to be vegan but not tell anyone

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The power to shoot lasers from your eyes when you eyes are closed

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The power to like this comment while you can't like any other ones.

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The power to shit in your eye

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The power to make dad jokes.

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the power to turn into a random piece of fruit.

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The ability to understand women!!

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the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

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The power to shrink tits by touching them.

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the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The power to get pulled over for going 1mph over the speed limit.

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The power to teleport up to 35 feet once a year

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!