The power to kill yourself to take out a criminal... except for the fact that when you kill yourself you literally might as well be throwing a marshmallow at someone.

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the power to not have power

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The power to lose the remote.

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The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

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The powers to have super speed when you can't run anymore.

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The ability to tell when someone last used the bathroom by licking their thumb.

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The power to know the answer of what is the purpose of life only after death.

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The power to make anyone with the exact same genetic makeup as you bleed at a wound if there is a bullet imbedded in their head

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The power to play a flute with your ass

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The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

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The power to think with a 6 year time gap

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The ability to have every pointless superpower then, now, and in the future.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The ability to teleport out of danger randomly, whenever you do you are handcuff at the hands and ancles naked. You also don't get to choose where you end up.

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The power to know when someone around you is about to sneeze but not the specific person

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The power to be a human

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The power to manipulate thermometers but not actually affect the temperature.

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The power of flight but only when you're within three feet of another person.

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The power to survive a car crash only if it's between 9 and 9.30 am.

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The power to have the confidence to ask anyone out but always get rejected.

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The power to fill in ___ blank

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The power to be the best driver in the world, when not moving.

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The ability to fart inwards.

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The power to walk into Mordor.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!