The Power Hear Everything that happens within the closest McDonald's

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

thumb_up thumb_down +77

ability to run very fast without stopping forever

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to become extremely good at licking pussy... cats.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to see where light is not present.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

The power that when you think of someone's face your nostrils are filled with the smell of their feet

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to remember every moment of your suckish life

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to put everything off till the last possible day

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The ability to type without having to use the shift key.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

the power to like mass effect 3

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to eat junk food at light speed

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The power to read bladders. You would always know when someone has to pee.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to see at night but only black objects.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power of reincarnate but have absolutely no memory of your previous lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

the power to get really mad.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to find lost socks.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Can fall without taking any injury, but for only 1 foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

the power to summon 10 ants every week

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The power to teleport to the last place you shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

the ability to make trees grow when you orgasm.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!