The power to be dyslexic at will

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The power to watch tv while sleeping

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The power to see correctly with wearing glasses

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to get out of finger locks, only by switching fingers.

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the power to see when the lights are on

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The power to look busy at work but only when the boss is not looking.

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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Find Waldo

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The power to object to every point you try to... Moral: OBJECTION!

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The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

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The power to wear your shirt backwards all day.

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ability to run very fast without stopping forever

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The power to shoot socks out of your hands.

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The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

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the power to kiss your own ass

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The ability to smell with your hands

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the power to sh*t brix at will!

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The ability to fart inwards.

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The power to talk to animals and have them partially understand you.

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The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

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the power to fly for a second

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The power to make cats burp.

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Turning into a brick wall. Forever.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!