The power to be HUMAN

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The power to speak with death people..

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The power to levitate mustard.

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The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

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The power to slow the rate grass grows for 10 seconds every 13 years.

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The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

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the power to view the same insurance commercials over and over for years and recite them from memory

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the power to grow mustache combs from your fingernails, but lack the ability to grow facial hair

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The power to grow increasingly warm fur as your body temperature rises.

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The power to make any single girl instantly reach for her Mace.

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the power to get struck by lightning at will.

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The power to talk to talking animals.

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The power to turn time back... To the point where you turned it back.

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The power to glow in the dark

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the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

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The power to die when you do Anything!!!

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The power to sleep

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The power to withstand camel rape.

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The power to infinitely generate cardboard

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The power to have a black president

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The power to fill in ___ blank

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The power to die and come back as a invincible bug that lives for 5 seconds

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The power to shit yourself whenever other people are looking at you

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The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!