The power to take huge shits at will.

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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The power to make your hair turn green but only if you are holding green hair dye and when you use the power the green hair dye goes away

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Birthday In August Just wait On it

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The power to poop out your penis.

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the power to spontaneously shoot glitter out of your ass

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The ability to lose all your limbs on command.

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The power to understand animals but only extinct animals

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the power to find children extremely attractive

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the power to walk in lava and fire unless you are hot

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The power to walk forward and walk backwards at the same time in a lying down position while your asleep having a wet dream about goat puppies.

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The power to change any text in sight from US to British spelling.

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The power to make anyone with the exact same genetic makeup as you bleed at a wound if there is a bullet imbedded in their head

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the power to hover 1 atom above the ground

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The power to be white and have a the pingas a size of a black man. Moral: You cannot comprehend the power of the dark side.

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the power two become drunk at anytime

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the ability to hold your breath for ever while being on land

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The power to see as Stevie Wonder

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the power to be on time daily, but only after ur late

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The ability to sit down without using any other body part than your butt.

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The power to know when someone around you is about to sneeze but not the specific person

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The power to fly whenever you get a stroke. (The power goes away as soon as the stroke ends, so make sure to get all your flying deeds done while you still have a stroke)

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The power to only be able to mind control goldfish one at a time

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An ability to exist without any food but only after you eat some food.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!