The power to make someone see your smile slightly whiter

The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

The power to perfectly sing any song by Justin Bieber

The power to die at will.

The power to communicate with inter-dimensional beings, but they're reeeeally annoying.

The power to feel pain when your drinking acid.

the power to disappear up your own asshole

The power to be a bird that can't fly

The power to give epilepsy to hamsters.

The power to shoot milk through your eyes

The power to get massive boners when you are reading a presentation.

the power to orgasm more than once in one round of sex. the thing is, after the 4th time, it gets slightly uncomfortable.

the power to fart in 7 different colors

The power to touch anything that is touchable.

The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

the power to turn star wars figurines into sticky notes, only on sunday afternoons

the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

The power to be invincible to every thing but fire water tornadoes bullets explosions guns knifes blades swords grenades sticks pointy objects disease infections sicknesses flu illness natural disasters accidents vehicles trucks electricity meteors bombs rockets drug addiction peer pressure starvation tiredness torture pain monkeys radiation

The power to hear everything in pig-Latin.

The power to switch your right and left ears.

The power to possess every pointless superpower and be tasked with saving the world.

The power to suck deez nuts

To summon a duct tape PEICE for 3 seconds then disappears but you can only do it each century

the power to never laugh at funny things but laugh nonstop at all other times

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!