The power to meme 20% harder

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The ability to read a doctor's handwriting

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The power to have wood when you wake up.

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The power to be scared shitless and run around like a retard for about 100 minutes.

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to believe people will vote for you`re comment, which starts WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY in the back.

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the power to see when the lights are on

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The power to not exist.

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The power to look busy at work but only when the boss is not looking.

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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The power to only be physically attractive to blind people.

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The power to have your piss turn to solid gold before it exits you.

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the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire or be

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The ability to type without having to use the shift key.

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The power to have tacos appear in front of you, only to have them stolen by a black guy.

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The power to teleport your self 5 feet ahead of you every 3 seconds

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Hitler Superpowers. The ability to kill 3 million Jews.

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The power to read your own thoughts.

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The power to turn anyone into a magical butterfly that can't fly with its wing but the only thing it can do maniacal is make himself fly.

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The power to fly but only if you standing on the ground

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The power to withstand Justin Bieber's music.

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.sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop ehT

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The power to make any girl hate you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!