The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

the power to see when the lights are on

The power to look busy at work but only when the boss is not looking.

The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

The power to only be physically attractive to blind people.

the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire or be

the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

The ability to type without having to use the shift key.

The power to have tacos appear in front of you, only to have them stolen by a black guy.

The power to teleport your self 5 feet ahead of you every 3 seconds

The power to correct spelling mistakes on road signs

how bout the power to shit bricks....

The power to read your own thoughts.

The power to fly but only if you standing on the ground

The power to turn anyone into a magical butterfly that can't fly with its wing but the only thing it can do maniacal is make himself fly.

The power to withstand Justin Bieber's music.

.sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop ehT

The power to flip the world upside-down when you do a handstand.

The power to turn things in to wood

The power to learn only at school.

The power to be invincible everywhere but your face

The power to be powerless in situations u need them the most.

The power to become an extremely attractive straight man in only the presence of 83 year old homosexual men

The power to be millionaire, but only when you have a million dollars.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!