The power to silence explosions.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to breathe underwater, only in sewers.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to wipe your ass once, and only once.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The ability to teleport, but only into solid stone.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

thumb_up thumb_down +93

the power to die

thumb_up thumb_down +85

the power to sell jars of bodily fluids for $25 each but get arressted shortly after

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to swallow thousand liters of sperm without any ill effects.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to burn ashes

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to manage Chelsea FC

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The ability to obtain a date with any girl you want, but only if you are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The power to mis-spell words but only on the internet

thumb_up thumb_down +57

I can talk to fish.... They don't have a lot to say

thumb_up thumb_down +53

the power to not have power

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power of turning on the lights without touching the switch but only when its daytime

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How 'bout the power to move you? - Wonderboy

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The power to create brilliant memes, but you don't have access to the internet.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to go your nose hair by 3 inches every 3 hours

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to have logs come out a tiny hole in your body. Oh wait... - SMC Digital

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The power to have out bursts of funny inapropite jokes when ever u want............only while at a funeral

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The power to make fish appear in pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to have broads in Atlanta.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power to go through open windows

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!