The ability to not finish sen...

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The ability to eat Oreos and not have diarrhea after.

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The power to read minds but only if the person is thinking the exact same thing as you.

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the power to grow stings out of your genitals

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The power to be happy whenever you want, but only at funerals

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X-ray vision which only allows you to see through clothes that are made of glass.

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The ability to know if a movie's crappy just by looking at its cover !

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The ability to cause cancer, but only at your own joyful events, like on your birthdays, wedding day, etc.

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the power to die tomorrow morning.

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The power to attract bullets

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The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

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"man hiding at the ladies room" "woman enters" SURPRIIIIIISEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeAERHG! Ok so now we know my dick fits up your ass... hi my name is... why you crying?

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The power to remotely _jizz in someone's sock

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The ability to become shit forever.

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The power to have a super power,

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the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

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The ability to fly but your hand have to touch the earth

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The power to strap a bomb on your chest, walk into a crowded area, and detonate it

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the power make tomatoes turn green.

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The ability to break all of your bones when you see any person

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Ability to sense moon cycle based on libido.

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The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

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The power to look TV

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The power to stop time for 1 second

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!