The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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The power to put out light from your butt

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the power to fly but your an Altophobic

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The power to pause and resume time, but you also pause yourself.

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The power to have excellent wifi when all your devices are dead.

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KeemStar

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The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

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the power to make food disappear in your mouth only when your mouth is not closed.

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The power not to cut yourself when you shave your face, but you're female.

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The power to fall unconscious at will.

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The power to shoot yogurt from your armpits once a month

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The power to see through bones.

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The power to be -100% faster...

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The power to type on a key board. WAIT A MINUTE

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The ability to scull down endless amounts of softdrink without vomiting

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Everything you touch turns into piles of steaming shit.

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The power to attract bullets

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the power to turn into rouge the bat so you can touch her boobs

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The power to obtain money, by going to work

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The power to swallow a teaspoon of cinnamon.

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The power of evolving a cancer cell everytime you blink

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The power to shit rainbows but have incredible pain while shitting them.

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The power to turn on the TV with the remote

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!