the power to die on command

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The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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the power to do two suicide bombings

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The power to control any type of urine or feces

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The power to think of pointess facts at any given moment

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the power to jizz spontaniously but only in school.

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The ability to read a doctor's handwriting

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THE POWER TO INSERT *X**A**S***S***E* TO YOUR MONITOR . Captcha; Kick your Heels

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The power to sing like Rebecca Black.

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Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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The ability to create very weak wifi with a 1000000 character password.

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power to teleport to hell. You cannot teleport anywhere else.

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The power to be invisible when your eyes are closed.

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The power to buy anything for free, as long as it is black.

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the power to always do your homework but never turn it in to the teacher.... RESULTS=failure

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The power to shoot water out of your hands--but only when taking a shower.

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http://www.psncodegenerator.com/?i=1109830µ the ability to make that site work XD

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Power to see through clothes... only to see more clothes

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The power to send emails via pigeon

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Laser vision but only if you are looking into a mirror

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The power to stop people from walking through closed doors.

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invinsibility to everything except for thing that hurt or kill you....

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the ability to transport anywhere and into any situation, but you never know where

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!